This is very true..........
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary
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> 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
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> 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
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> 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
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> 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
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> 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
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> 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
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> 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
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> 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
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> 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
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> 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
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> 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
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> Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary
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> Day 983 of my captivity.
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> My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
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> They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are
> fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for
> the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in
> order to keep up my strength.
>
> The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an
> attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
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> Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
> feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it
> clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
> condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
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> Bastards.
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> There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
> placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
>
> However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that
> my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what
> this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
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> Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
> tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
> this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
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> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
>
> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
> seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
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> The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with
> the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
> captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,
> so he is safe. For now...